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category: residue [glöplog]
@ringo - yes
added on the 2013-07-27 23:03:43 by CeRi CeRi
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added on the 2013-07-28 09:39:18 by w00t! w00t!
Super Troopers.

[Foster and Mac have pulled a man over for speeding and are deciding what game to play]

Mac: All right, how about "Cat Game?"

Foster: Cat Game? What's the record?

Mac: Thorny did six, but I think you can do ten.

Foster: Ten? Starting right 'meow?'

[Mac laughs - they walk up to the car, and Foster taps on the driver side]

Larry Johnson: Sorry about the...

Foster: All right meow. (1) Hand over your license and registration.

[the man hands him his license]

Foster: Your registration? Hurry up meow. (2)

[Mac ticks off two fingers]

Larry Johnson: Sorry.

[the man laughs a little]

Foster: Is there something funny here boy?

Larry Johnson: Oh, no.

Foster: Then why you laughing, Mister... Larry Johnson?

[pause]

Foster: All right meow, (3) where were we?

Larry Johnson: Excuse me, are you saying meow?

Foster: Am I saying meow?

[Mac puts his hands up for the fourth one, but makes an "eehhh" facial expression, as he is considering the last one]

Larry Johnson: I thought...

Foster: Don't think boy. Meow, (4) do you know how fast you were going?

[man laughs]

Foster: Meow. (5) What is so damn funny?

Larry Johnson: I could have sworn you said meow.

Foster: Do I look like a cat to you, boy? Am I jumpin' around all nimbly bimbly from tree to tree?

[Mac is gut-busting laughing]

Foster: Am I drinking milk from a saucer?

[feigned anger]

Foster: Do you see me eating mice?

Foster: [Mac and the man are laughing their heads off now] You stop laughing right meow! (6)

Larry Johnson: [the man stops and swallows hard] Yes sir.

Foster: Meow, (7) I'm gonna have to give you a ticket on this one. No buts meow. (8) It's the law.

[rips off the ticket and hands it to the man]

Foster: Not so funny meow, (9) is it?

Foster: [Foster gets up to leave, but Mac shakes his hands at him, indicating only nine meows] Meow! (10)
added on the 2013-07-28 19:01:22 by ringofyre ringofyre
an help to the crisis: when you choose a woman to get her pregnant, take care she loved the pleasure.
added on the 2013-07-29 18:54:14 by Bartoshe Bartoshe
Multitasking...
added on the 2013-07-29 19:10:53 by w00t! w00t!
at my death, I will take the same pleasure than the women who loved me. the machine is set to explore time, but with animals we built télépathies to communicate throught time. it was on my road map since 1996. as winning to lottery with my first gen of children, and more, I've built brain artefacts to create some cool stuffs and it's not parasitism as known from usual humans.

the story starts with poor minded that did not come back to their mind since I've showed us some parts of my reality with the Fundamentals of brain communications. in fact, brain understandings lead the process and I was close to recognize sanity of women felling observed mentally.

common humans are perverts since psychiatry kill the only people who take care of children safety because the artefacts requiered are not available yet.
humans whant to feel like gods and abuse of children, generally.

people who think they have gives from god(s) do not understand generally that the belief cause trauma (epilepsy) to children and it's only an example of poor mindness.

more over, poisonning by poisonning with the pretention of healing, people lives with asceptisations that make them poor mentally and on all my artefacts upon brain, they think they are successfull slundering me and abuse me children and they only believed doing right.

so, it's called remote viewing, a capacity to share my view (with some part of hallucinations and mind alterations) but in fact, common people simply want to feel good then I'm not poised so much.

it's understandings of links between people, and for example racism is the miss goal of feeling good giving acnea to the best upon old gentic skin.

the hateners are products of wars as the poor minded, but with my works of genetic since 1997, I can complete genomes and they've believed it was important to make wars because of poor minded. silly world.

moreover, it's known as hermetism to take the global sense of this art, and as I'm suffering from cancer and pains, I've just hypnotize them (because the result is hypnotisation) to live longer.
for example, my dark shit of stomach cancer happens in early 2005.

usually I'm bored by humans, and they still think it was poisonning me, to pretend gives from gods, pretend being clean, pretend they are not skizs.

funny stuff, they feel like if they were intelligents with no degrees and causing attempt to my children to make them doing sound from scat's habits.

in fact, it's applying principle of energy conservation and understandings lead to nebulae. poor minded are rapist born people, and alienates, parasites and perverts.

to hallucinate, you have right to not eat, suffer from pain, not sleep, and such a sanity thing in this world of consumption and you can find all the basics on my web site, and it's easy to tell perverts they are not owned to think.
added on the 2013-07-29 19:23:39 by Bartoshe Bartoshe
Anyone, to react on Bart? Please?
added on the 2013-07-29 19:50:01 by w00t! w00t!
Meow w00t, don't be mean!
added on the 2013-07-29 23:30:05 by ringofyre ringofyre
Should we start making long posts meow ? (2)
added on the 2013-07-29 23:38:05 by Korguiq Korguiq
Don't distract me *stubs toe*, OW! (3)?
added on the 2013-07-30 00:30:41 by ringofyre ringofyre
Watch out, you're gonna walk in the oomfa!

Also, meow. :3
added on the 2013-07-30 00:50:58 by Korguiq Korguiq
Dude, what sort of animal makes an "oomfa" sound?

Oh god! I just read barts post. Properly.
My brain is now bent. Not in a good way.
added on the 2013-07-30 01:12:06 by ringofyre ringofyre
Need I say more?
added on the 2013-07-30 11:15:14 by w00t! w00t!
Oomfa!
added on the 2013-07-30 11:52:52 by Korguiq Korguiq
Oomfa. Right meow!
added on the 2013-07-30 14:03:55 by ringofyre ringofyre
I was trying to picture a kangaroo making "oomfa" every time it would jump. It would make me laugh hard, at least for a few minutes. ^^

Regarding this oomfa thing, it actually comes from an old joke by Coluche, a now dead french humorist and actor. The joke went more or less like:

An american politician gives a speech to a few hundreds of native americans and says stuff like: "There will be more jobs, less taxes, more land, etc etc..." and everytime he ends a sentence, they all go: "Oomfa! Oomfa!". The politician thinks "Wow! Seems my words have a great effect on them." and such... So, for about half an hour that's "blah blah blah" "Oomfa!" "blah blah" "Oomfa!"...

The politician and his native american counsellor leave the place, and after a few meters outside, the counsellor then says: "Watch out, sir, you're gonna walk in the oomfa."...

I'm not the best at telling jokes, so please bear with me. At least now, you know where it's from. ;)
added on the 2013-07-30 14:41:24 by Korguiq Korguiq
A salesman was visiting an indian reservation one evening and was talking to the chief about his product. As the day goes on the chief invites him to stay the night and play golf with him the next day. As an added bonus the chief gives him a squaw for the night tellin him that she doesn't speak a word of english, and he can do anything he wants with her. That night as he is having sex with her she keeps yelling oomfa, oomfa, oomfa. Well he thinks he's giving it to her pretty good if she's making so much noise.
The next day he and the chief are playing their golf game and on the fifth hole he shoots a hole in one and starts yelling OOMFA, OOMFA, the chief looks at him and says "What do you mean, wrong hole?".
added on the 2013-07-30 16:44:24 by w00t! w00t!
Haha, not bad... :D
added on the 2013-07-30 21:38:59 by Korguiq Korguiq
Jokes is it?

Why do dogs lick their balls?

Because they can.
added on the 2013-07-30 22:01:51 by ringofyre ringofyre
Okay... What is red and smells like blue paint ? :p

...

Red paint.
added on the 2013-07-31 08:16:10 by Korguiq Korguiq
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added on the 2013-07-31 08:50:06 by w00t! w00t!
Two [Pick your ethnicity] men walk into a bar.
The bartender says, "This is a joke isn't it?"
added on the 2013-07-31 08:50:11 by ringofyre ringofyre
3 guys all end up St Peter's Gates at roughly the same time. St. Peter asks them hoe they got there.
The 1st guy says - "I thought my wife was cheating on me so I came home early and found her alone naked in bed and clearly up to no good. I got so angry and frustrated that I picked up our wardrobe and threw it out of the window onto the street"

The 2nd tells St. Peter - "I was walking down the street when all of a sudden a huge, heavy wooden wardrobe flew out of an upstairs window and landed on me."

St. Peter turns to the 3rd guy who says - "So, I was crouched in this wardrobe minding my own business when all of a sudden....."
added on the 2013-07-31 08:56:41 by ringofyre ringofyre
So, what do we do meow?
added on the 2013-08-02 09:21:12 by Korguiq Korguiq
Yes. What do we do meow?
added on the 2013-08-05 13:16:43 by w00t! w00t!

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